The Cleveland Browns improved their preseason record to 2-1 after defeating the Tennessee Titan 23-17 on Saturday night. After the game, head coach Eric Mangini participated in a 3-hour press conference in which he didn’t actually SAY anything. Here is just a sample of the Q&A from that press conference:

(On if Brady Quinn played well enough to be named the starting QB) “We’ll look at the tape and keep evaluating it. I have no timetable for that decision.”

(On the follow-up question: ‘Do you realize the season begins in less than two weeks?’) “I’ll have to look at my calendar. But the one I have, versus the one you have….they may not match up. They may not be the same.”

(On if he has been pleased that Braylon Edwards has not dropped a ball recently) “We’ll keep evaluating it and soon he’ll be there.”

(On the follow-up question: ‘Be where? Where will Braylon be?’) “We’ll have to take a look at the tape and see.”

This went on for what seemed like an eternity, leading this reporter to believe that coach Mangini is either a former CIA operative or affiliated in some way with the mob. We would have learned more about the Browns if we had interviewed his discarded wad of chewing gum.

New Browns coach Eric Mangini says his punter competition is far from over. But veteran Dave Zastudil and newcomer Jakub Krzynowek are ready to strut their stuff again in the upcoming game against the Tennessee Titans. “What I want to see is toughness from these two. I want to see them kick the sh*t out of the ball tonight,” Mangini said. “Lord knows they are going to have plenty of opportunities.” Last week, Krzynowek outplayed Zastudil, but both looked far from improving on last year’s 4-12 mark. Krzynowek, the fan favorite, is a former soccer star in his native Poland. His boyish good looks and goofy accent are a particular hit with female fans. Zastudil, the incumbent punter, has less of a huddle presence but has a particularly strong ankle. Although the regular season is just two weeks away, Mangini has set no timetable for his decision.

Prosecutors asked a judge to throw out a public lewdness charge against a 10-year-old boy accused of urinating on a Tennessee Titans logo while his best friend Hobbes was on lookout for the police. Municipal prosecutors in Cleveland filed a motion Thursday to dismiss the charge against Calvin, who suffers from incontinence. His arrest sparked calls from upset city residents and Browns fans across the country. “As far as we’re concerned this is over,” said city attorney Larry Rush. “A prosecutor is supposed to do justice. Once we learned of the circumstances we decided this was certainly a case that should not be prosecuted. The kid couldn’t help himself!” “Thank you, Jesus. Glory, Hallelujah!” Calvin told the Press-Register newspaper after learning of the city’s motion. Coincidentally, the Browns play the Titans this weekend.